[As will be immediately apparent, this is a fictional piece tying into the Pacific Rim universe. Further explanation below.]
There’s a giant monster destroying San Francisco.
I’m not even making that up. There is an actual, literal giant monster in San Francisco right now. It crawled up out of the ocean and it tore through the freaking Golden Gate Bridge and is now destroying SF as I type this. Or maybe they’ve killed it already. I don’t know. I needed a break from all the damn talking heads for a while and I haven’t checked Twitter.
Like. What is this? This is. I don’t even know. I don’t understand it. (And god, some awful jokestery part of me wants to call up the Discovery Channel and ask them how their fauxcumentary filmmakers missed this guy while they were looking for megalodons. Like seriously, people are fucking dead and I’m making jokes about fucking Shark Week. PRIORITIES, IDIOT.)
And then there’s this logicky, science-y part of me trying to figure out the 300-foot-tall monster, because, you know, MEGAFAUNA DON’T EXIST ANYMORE. Like, wasn’t the whole thing about the dinos being huge because there was way more O2 in the atmosphere? Or something? And yeah, blue whales and stuff, but STILL. This thing crawled up OUT of the ocean and has been merrily destroying San Francisco all day and it’s STILL NOT DEAD. FROM O2 DEP OR OTHERWISE. (I just checked Twitter. Yeah.)
And I don’t even know why I’m going on about this crap because it’s not even effing relevant, y’know? People are DEAD and I’m carrying on about megafauna and the Discovery Channel (and dammit brain THE MYTHBUSTERS ARE THE OPPOSITE OF RELEVANT RIGHT NOW)
And okay like maybe I just need a coping mechanism because god fing knows my anxiety has been handling this SO well. And I live in the fucking Midwest, literally days away from the nearest ocean. And Mister IRL-Gojira-whatever.
I do need a coping mechanism. I’ve basically been kind of all shaky all day, and of course the pictures on every website everywhere are not helping. Like, who decided to make up that before and after of the SF skyline? Who’s that messed up? (other than the journalists who will mock up the same thing as soon as the guy is dead.)
Like. 9/11 freaked me out as a kid (I wrote a terrible poem about it, even), and it turns out that 12 years later I still don’t have the necessary emotional tools to deal with huge shit like this. (And I mean like HUGE stuff. Like shootings are one thing, and then there’s this shit.) I’ve had that empty, dropped-out-the-bottom feeling in my stomach all day. Plus the anxiety shakes, what fun, and the endless worry worry worry about everything (like my friend in SF, who of course I can’t get a hold of, and then what if Big Guy lumbers down the coast ‘cause they can’t kill him, my whole extended family literally lives in LA, what if another shows up and beelines for SoCal, what if what if what if and this is why my brain is the worst sometimes).
Li—I keep on saying like a lot. What is happening is… something else. I almost said literally indescribable, but I can describe it all right. I just don’t want to, because that would make it more real than I’m willing to accept at the moment.
And okay this has gone on long enough without me actually saying anything important or interesting so I’m just gonna go stare at the news some more. Or maybe I’ll watch Doctor Who or something. God knows I need cheering up.
(155/260)
EXPLANATION: So some fabulous PacRim fans on Tumblr put together a Tumblr-based convention for the movie called Jaegercon. There’s been all sorts of cool stuff going on, like a gift exchange and interviews with cast and crew members and fandom bingo. Which, if you’re not familiar with the concept, basically is like regular bingo, except the card is full of prompts, you fill the card with fanworks instead of little buttons.
One of my prompts was K-Day, which is the PacRim universe is the day the first kaiju attacked Earth, making land in San Francisco. I thought I would take a different tack to the prompt. I initially thought about making a vlog, but then decided that I’m not a good enough actress for that, so instead I basically made a piece of blogging performance art, imagining my response to K-Day if I was living in the PacRim universe.
Or, more simply, this entry is blatant self-insert fanfiction only situationally connected to canon. Hope you like!
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